Wednesday, November 2, 2016

a slump. a rut.

I'm in a slump of life right now. 

You've probably figured that out by now. But I just thought I'd go ahead and get it out there. I'm not exactly sure when or why it started, but it did and now I'm just stuck in a little rut and can't seem to get out. Thus the lack of blogging. 

Lately more things than usual have been getting to me. I try not to let them and I try to find the good and the joy and the happy in each and every day. But my goodness, sometimes it's just hard to do that.  
Things like this have been getting to me: 

- wanting Oliver to have a room of his own. I'm thankful our laundry room is big enough for his crib so he can sleep in peace and Emerson can sleep in peace and I don't have to worry about their safety like I would if they were sharing a room [Emerson can be wild y'all]. But I want his toys and books in a bedroom for him. I want to go in there to play and not in the hallway or our bedroom. I know we kind of brought this upon ourselves, you know, having another baby while living here, but he's one of the very best things in my life and you can't put life on hold just because of your circumstances and where you live and all. Live life! But I so desperately just wish he had a bedroom of his very own right now. 

- the toys and books that are piled high in our little upstairs hallway/landing area. I'm so thankful for them, but my goodness, I just want to be able to open the linen closet without moving every blessed toy out of the way. 

- our kitchen is tiny and it makes for meal prep that I already dislike even more detestable. 

- my hubby and I just can't seem to agree on some big home and family life issues right now. It's frustrating. 

- I'm convinced that mamas who have shops they run from their home or work from home, have family nearby to help with the kiddos and/or they send their littles to preschool or mother's day out or they can afford to hire a babysitter or some such thing. While working on products for my shop is something I love doing, it's next to impossible to do because there is no time to do it in. Well, there's nap time, but I have to split nap time between my shop, cleaning a little bit, regaining my sanity, and doing other little must do chores like paying the bills and such. Who has time to do it all?! 

- our house is a wreak and I don't care. I'm leaving it that way until I absolutely have to get it cleaned up for the showings we will have when it comes time to put it on the market in a few months. ugh. 

- it drives me bonkers when people ask and ask for you to do something that you're going to do anyway. Just let me do it when I get around to it. Don't you  know I wrangle two very active little boys all day every day and have zero time away from them. Ever. And I love that. I truly do. But it makes for even little things like posting pictures on Instagram somewhat of a chore. 

- sometimes I just wish I could have a little break. Go do something by myself for myself. Something that wasn't grocery shopping or errands or some other such thing. Like get coffee or go to the book store. But even in the rare and very off chance I do get to run somewhere by myself, the errands must be done and so that takes priority. Obviously. 

I'll spare you and stop my ranting there. But thanks for listening. It just helps to get things out there sometimes. 

Happy November! 

Maybe one day before Christmas I'll finally share some Halloween pictures? ;) 



Ashley Brickner said...

Oh friend. I TOTALLY get it! 100%. We all have those moments! You deserve some time to go to a coffee shop!

Lindsay at Lindsay'sSweetWorld said...

I'm sorry you're in a rut right now, Hannah! Hopefully you can dig your way out soon! It's good that you got all of this out of you in a post, because now maybe it can help you clear your head a little since you were able to organize your thoughts. Thinking of you!

Amy said...

Oh friend, I'm sorry you are in a rut. I've been in one myself lately. Things have been a struggle lately. Our house, jobs, marriage, just everything has been affected. It's been a difficult few weeks & I could have written this post myself. Hugs, friend!

Jillian said...

Me too! Not at this very moment, but I think we can all say we've experienced these kind of ruts where everything just seems irritable or just bleh.... hang in there friend! ''Tis a season... praying for it to pass quickly!!!

Courtney said...

You know I 1000% understand!

Laura Marie Keenan said...

Oh I can so relate to this! Not having family nearby is one of my biggest complaints! That paired me wanting to move home but my husband having major career aspirations. It's tough!